Marriage and Relationship Check-ups | Dr. James Cordova #87

In today’s episode of Stronger Marriage Connection, hosts Dr. Dave Schramm and Dr. Liz Hale welcome Dr. James Cordova to discuss the concept of relationship checkups. Just like regular doctor or dental checkups, Dr. Cordova advocates for regular relationship checkups to prevent relationship deterioration and enhance mental and physical health. They explore the importance of proactive relationship health care and the development of Arammu, The Relationship Checkup Inc., aimed at improving relationship health in both military and civilian populations.

About Dr. James Cordova:

Dr. James Cordova is Department Chair and Professor of Psychology at Clark University in Worcester, Massachusetts. Dr. Cordova is a leading figure in the field of Couples Research and Therapy. He is the developer of The Relationship Checkup, a preventative relationship healthcare intervention designed to prevent relationship deterioration through the relationship health equivalent of the annual physical health checkup.

Dr. Cordova was co-PI, with retired Lt. Colonel Jeffrey Cigrang, and their Air Force team, on a recently completed $1.3M DoD-funded grant to conduct a full-scale randomized control trial of the Relationship Checkup in the Air Force’s integrated behavioral healthcare settings. The study demonstrated that the Checkup is easily adapted to primary care settings in the Air Force and has a significant positive effect on the relationship health and depression of Airmen and their spouses.

Dr. Cordova is the founder and President of Arammu: The Relationship Checkup, Inc., a university-based startup company created to disseminate the Checkup throughout both military and civilian populations and improve the overall relationship health of the country as a whole. Arammu Inc. currently partners with the Office of the Secretary of Defense to train over one thousand Military and Family Life Counselors serving all branches of the military.

Insights:

• Dr. Cordova: We need to shift our perspective on relationships to view them as a form of health care that requires regular checkups. Just like physical health, regular preventative relationship checkups are crucial for maintaining long-term relationship health.
• Dave: Investing in relationships through regular checkups is one of the most important investments one can make. It’s comparable to maintaining physical health through good nutrition, exercise, and regular doctor visits. Without intentional and planned efforts, relationships can naturally drift apart, so there is a necessity of consistent investment in maintaining strong relationships.
• Liz: Love the porcupine analogy in marriage, it’s important to recognizing that both partners can unintentionally cause pain. Focus on addressing the impact of our actions rather than the intent, and remember the need to respond with care and healing when hurt occurs, as both partners are vulnerable to causing and feeling pain.

Dr. James Cordova’s Resources:
https://arammu.com/

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It's often said that marriage takes work. The Stronger Marriage Connection podcast wants to help because a happy marriage is worth the effort. USU Family Life Professor Dr. Dave Schramm and Clinical Psychologist Dr. Liz Hale talk with experts about the principles and practices that will enhance your commitment, compassion, and emotional connection. 

More than ever before, marriages face obstacles, from the busyness of work and daily hassles to disagreements and digital distractions. It's no wonder couples sometimes drift apart, growing resentful, lonely, and isolated.

The Utah Marriage Commission invites you to listen and discover new ways to strengthen and protect your marriage connection today!