Marriage and Raising Children with Autism | Sage Allen | #79

Today Sage Allen discusses the stresses and challenges she's encountered with her son who has severe autism and how this affects her marriage. Sage opens up about the raw realities of day-to-day care, and how important it is to make time for both self-care and date nights. Sage shares tips for other parents who find themselves overwhelmed and exhausted, including intentionally finding the good in each day and reaching out for support systems, including online groups.

About Sage Allen
Sage Erickson Allen has a master's degree in marriage family human development from BYU. ,
She taught marriage preparation at BYU and marriage enrichment classes for USU Extension in
St. George, UT for a few years. She stopped teaching when her first child was diagnosed with
severe autism around age two. That child is seven years old now and is completely nonverbal
with low functioning autism and ADHD. In her spare time, Sage likes ballroom dancing and
writing for her casual blog, sagerelationshipadvice.com. She also enjoys advocating for people
with disabilities and families that need more help managing the stresses that accompany raising a child with a disability.

Insights:

• Sage: "I'd like to tell everyone that you really can have a great fulfilling marriage with a disabled child. At feels impossible. And it kind of feels like you'll never be happy again when you have that big of a trial, but then it really does get better. And you can have a great marriage and a great life.
• Dave: "An internal insight is, I can't be, my feelings. I'm going to feel things but I've got to learn to feel it but not follow it, if that makes sense. And not let it spill over and into my parenting or into my marriage or, or how I see the situation or complain about this or that in my life because it can always be poisonous, right? And how that that spills over."
• Liz: "I was pretty naive; I still am with autism. Thank you for the reminder of the three stages and that Utah has a way to go. That saddens me and it also gives me great hope with advocates like you and people who are willing to speak out and speak up for their loved ones or children. With that, I hope things do continue to grow and change."

Sage Allen Links:

https://sagerelationshipadvice.com

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It's often said that marriage takes work. The Stronger Marriage Connection podcast wants to help because a happy marriage is worth the effort. USU Family Life Professor Dr. Dave Schramm and Clinical Psychologist Dr. Liz Hale talk with experts about the principles and practices that will enhance your commitment, compassion, and emotional connection. 

More than ever before, marriages face obstacles, from the busyness of work and daily hassles to disagreements and digital distractions. It's no wonder couples sometimes drift apart, growing resentful, lonely, and isolated.

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