Establishing Household Roles: Tips For Couples to Avoid Conflict | Dr. Julie Hanks | #119

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Today on Stronger Marriage Connection, hosts Dr. Liz Hale and Dr. Dave Schramm sit down with Dr. Julie Hanks, a licensed therapist specializing in marriage and family therapy. They discuss the challenges couples face when dividing household labor and how to create a fair and equitable partnership. Dr. Hanks introduces the concept of a partnership model of family organization, emphasizing the importance of communication, shared responsibility, and recognizing invisible work. Listeners will learn how to navigate traditional gender roles, reduce resentment, and establish healthy household dynamics to strengthen their relationships.

About Julie:

Julie de Azevedo Hanks holds a PhD in marriage and family therapy and is a licensed therapist specializing in the intersection of faith, family relationships, and women's mental health for 3 decades. She is the owner of Wasatch Family Therapy, author of The Assertiveness Guide for Women, host of Ask Dr. Julie Hanks podcast, adjunct faculty in the MSW program at Utah Valley University, and an online content creator. 

Insights:

• Julie: "Unpaid work is work, and it's just as important as paid work, and so value the work that you do that's unpaid, and value the work that your partner does that's unpaid. I just think that division has created a lot of problems in families. So, recognize and value unpaid work."
• Liz: "I think you know how to do the division without creating division, right, without creating more division. And so, I love that I hadn't really thought of unpaid labor and paid work, unpaid work. And paid work, I think, is maybe how you say it, and then coming home, and once the paid worker comes home, then how do we divide work from there? I had never thought of it that way. It's beautiful. It's kind of when that second part of the day begins."
• Dave: "I think that in addition to unpaid work and paid work, you brought up that kind of invisible or that worrying work, right? That, I think that it needs to be. Hey, thanks so much for planning this out. Or, you know, around the holiday season, my wife, she loves, you know, she takes over, but she loves it, then, you know, buying the presents for the kids, and she's just loves that, but there's a lot of actually mental planning and searching and on Amazon for, I mean, hours and deals. And she loves to get a deal, so I need to be more grateful, I think, as her husband."

Dr. Julie Hank's Links:

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https://www.pinterest.com/drjuliehanks/

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https://www.linkedin.com/in/drjuliehanks/

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This episode provides a compassionate and practical guide for anyone seeking to build healthier perspectives around sexuality, reduce shame, and improve intimacy in their relationships. Don't miss this deeply insightful discussion!

It's often said that marriage takes work. The Stronger Marriage Connection podcast wants to help because a happy marriage is worth the effort. USU Family Life Professor Dr. Dave Schramm and Clinical Psychologist Dr. Liz Hale talk with experts about the principles and practices that will enhance your commitment, compassion, and emotional connection. 

More than ever before, marriages face obstacles, from the busyness of work and daily hassles to disagreements and digital distractions. It's no wonder couples sometimes drift apart, growing resentful, lonely, and isolated.

The Utah Marriage Commission invites you to listen and discover new ways to strengthen and protect your marriage connection today!